He Tried To Make Himself Lighter

As a child

My father’s body was always so heavy

When he fell out of the wheelchair

I tried to pick him up and I believed

I would find the strength somewhere inside

Because I watched too many cartoons in the 80’s

There was always some magic moment

When your raised a ring or a sword to the sky

 

And music played and you become something bigger than you were

 

And then you were someone new

And then you had the strength to do anything

But I never could lift him off the floor

And when I carried the casket with his body in it

Through the church, with my brother and my uncles

I knew how much the casket should weigh

And how much his body should weigh

And it was heavier than it should’ve been

My father was trying to help his whole life

 

To make himself lighter than he was

 

 

And I only knew when I carried his casket.